Making an ass of you. And umption.

This morning I was treated to a sanctimonious lecture from someone working in another office. It started off as a nice little conversation about our children, but when I mentioned that my son wasn't too keen on the idea of trick-or-treating this year and said part of it was because he didn't seem to want to go up to the neighbor's houses and knock she jumped to all kinds of assumptions. She looked at me and said "Well, then I guess you should take him for walks so he can get to know his neighbors." Well, she doesn't know if we do that or not, now does she? And it just went on from there. But when it got to the point where she was telling me that next year when my son is five I will have to introduce the idea of Christmas as a "season of giving, and not receiving" and how she expects that I'll be taking him to volunteer at homeless shelters and soup kitchens I kind of checked out, mentally. And when she mentioned putting up a stocking for Jesus, I had to resist the urge to laugh ("Here's the stocking for our Zombie Lord and Savior, sweetie!"). The whole conversation on her end was so holier-than thou, it took everything in my power not to yell "Heifer - you don't KNOW me. Step off!" I was nice, though. Just smiled and nodded. Just remember people, no matter how well intentioned, your values are not always my values.