Invisible and unstoppable

Welcome to the U-S of A. Home of the brave. Land of the...not very free to listen to internet radio. A new, unfairly skewed fee structure for song copyrights set to go into effect on May 15th could force many internet radio stations to fold due to the high cost of royalties (read the Newsweek article). I listen to internet radio. I don't like the idea of not having the option of streaming commercial free music. Why? The answer is simple. Because main-stream or "commercial" radio is heavy on advertisement and light on content. There are local stations - one top 40 station in particular (that shall remain nameless here) - that don't even play a single minute of music during the morning commute time slot...and I would rather have a frontal lobotamy performed by a blind monkey with palsy than listen to someone whose ego has swelled to the point that their head is big enough to have a gravitational pull that affects local coastal tides. When they do actually play music, they play the same songs in heavy rotation with large blocks of advertisements and pointless host or dj chatter. And the three most insidious words in the recording industry: pay for play. I'm convinced that one of the ClearChannel stations here is being compensated for playing the abomination that is the Brook Hogan/Pall Wall single. I'd like to be able to have enough faith in humanity to think that NO ONE actually wants to hear that bit of over-produced schlock even once. Let alone five or six times in a day.

There's a petition at SaveNetRadio.org, and Pandora has been posting updates on the site blog. I whole heartedly am in favor of artists getting their due, and if that means increasing royalty fees, then fine. But lets make it applicable to all types of media. That way, it doesn't look like the RIAA, record labels and corporate behemoths such as ClearChannel aren't back-handedly putting the squeeze on internet-only content providers.

Since I'm feeling a little anti-establishment at the moment, I think this would be a very opportune time to post a few MP3s, seeing as I haven't done that for a while. The first song is one of my current favorites - the movie hasn't even hit theaters, and parts of the soundtrack are already circulating. The power of the internet. Its awesome!

• Snow Patrol - Signal Fire (from the upcoming Spider-Man 3 soundtrack - you can listen to the whole album here and check out the bands MySpace profile)


• Snow Patrol - Somewhere a Clock is Ticking


• M. Ward - Here Comes the Sun Again(From the Cadillac commercial that I keep seeing - here's his MySpace profile for more songs)


• Handsome Furs - What We Had

(UPDATE: The file links have been disabled.)

Haul loose the mooring line

I know I'm a little behind in the news, but I found this picture of physicist Stephen Hawking preparing for his space flight, and decided I needed to put it here.

"To confine our attention to terrestrial matters would be to limit the human spirit"

You can read more about Dr. Hawking's space flight and his writing & theories. He also has a web page, apparently maintained by one of his Graduate Assistants. I wonder...what else his GA's do for him...?

My son is watching some pointless drivel on the Disney channel, and a girl doing an interview with Johhny Depp about the new POTC movie (and yes - I did just abbreviate it like that) just asked him "When you're finished with filming, and you leave the set, do you ever still feel like a pirate?" -- I wasn't paying much attention, but his response wasn't what I wish it had been. In my head it happened like this: "Foolish little wench...I AM a pirate!"...looking around, confused..."Why is the rum gone?"

(For more - and better - Johnny Depp images, go here. And yes, M, there are pictures of Eric Bana for you, too. And don't forget, until you get a better internet connection, I am the Pirate King...savvy?)

"I PRETEND TO KNOW KARATE FOR A LIVING!"

The soon to be new boss was in town and stopped by for a visit. I was impressed that he remembered my name. I'm not even really thinking about the transition that will happen in about a month. Which will coincide with a milestone birthday for me this year. I just want to be able to get through this summer without having to resort to neuropharmacalogical assistance (that's a fancy way of saying "anti-depressants"). I'm in a deadline crunch, and I'm stressing a little, but...so much of what I'm doing right now is all new to me. Hopfully, they are patient and cut me a little slack. Or I'll have to cut them. A little slack. If you get my meaning. And I'm sure you do.

M and I did lunch today and were talking about seeing a movie soon. There aren't that many out this year that we both want to see. I think we'll go see Stardust in August. Of course, Zach Braff's new movie and the third Pirates of the Carribean installment (I still haven't seen the second one) come out next month, and she wants to see License to Wed - it's got John Krasinski in it, so I'm on board. Then later in the summer you've got the next Harry Potter sequel and the sequel to Elizabeth, called The Golden Age, will be in theaters in October - it has Clive Owen in it (skweee!). The Other Boelyn Girl is supposed to be released in December, too, but I haven't seen a production update on IMDB for a while, so who knows. I still say the casting for that one is all wrong, and it's going to be a huge distration - along with all of the glaring historical innacuracies and Scarlett Johanson's ginormous corseted boobs. [For a good site to see trailers and clips, try Movies.com]

Okay - whose brilliant idea was it to have Andy Samberg star in a movie? How many times do I have to say this, people: Unruly hair and pulling a goofy face do not equal funny. If they did I'd be the funniest human being ever born. In the history of humanity.

Also, don't get me started on the documentary Zoo...it's just gross. Don't know what I'm talking about? Be grateful and try to keep it that way *shudder*

For those who like Will Ferrell, I present to you The Landlord (slightly off color language alert, for the overly senstitive among you). I would have loved to have posted the actual video, but the websites's embed function doesn't work for crap and they had the video pulled from YouTube, so linking to it was my only choice.

Spongebob had better watch out...my son has a new favorite show on Nicktoons. I find it odd and slightly annoying - I don't even know if he understands what's going on...I know I sure don't. The best part of the episode comes during the scene transistions. Two words: Dancing sushi.

Light hugging will be permitted and gifts are always welcome

It's Admin Profs Day! Us office gals got a little lunch and some wee tokens of supervisorly appreciation. There was some side-gossip as well. It was nice. Now back to work!

I don't want to wait forever

Over the weekend I bought the new Muse album (I'm kind of meh on that one - so far there's only one song I like on the whole thing), and the previous Snow Patrol album, Final Straw (this one I love). In honor of how brilliant Snow Patrol is, here is the sweet video for the song Signal Fire they've done for the Spider-Man 3 soundtrack:



Also, to those in the know, I finished HP book 3 Friday night and am going through withdrawals. In addition, I think I accidently found out something from book 7 that I really didn't want to know - some rude person posted an unannounced spoiler on a forum for a totally unrelated topic. Thanks for possibly ruining it for me, anonymous internet jerk - my only consolation is the thought that you're not only a jerk, but a liar as well.

Come and get it! It's a flying buffet!

The neighbor's cats have been leaving presents for us lately. Or maybe they're supposed to be gifts for our cat? As if she's their unaccessable Queen behind the glass, and they're bringing her tributes in a bid to win royal favor. There's been a rather unfortunately deceased bird in the middle of my yard for a couple of weeks. It disappeared for a couple of days, which made me wonder if my worst fears hadn't come true and it had somehow managed to...reanimate. But then it showed back up - still quite dead, thankfully (but still unfortunately - for the bird). The cats must have been playing with it and then brought it back. I really should ask my husband to clean up the remains...

Lowering the bar makes it easier to belly up to.

Some people consult their horoscopes to see what kind of day they'll probably have. I consult my calendar. Today it looks like this: 8:30 am - 12:00 pm Training...12:00 pm - 12:30 pm Project...12:30 pm - 1:00 pm Lunch...1:00 pm - 2:00 pm More training...2:30 pm - 5:00 pm Project. So according to my calendar, half of my day will be spent in a boredom induced coma, and the other half will be spent in a project-deadline panic frenzy.
I got a lot of information at the earlier training, although I'm not sure how much most of it will help me right now. I had told a couple of people that they needed to go to a "beginners" training session in the morning for what I was going to in the afternoon as an "experienced" user. Guess what. They didn't go.
I've decided I'm not buying and bringing in the plates, utensils, sugar, coffee creamer, etc. any more. I bring it in, and certain people use it. Then they don't replace it. So, I'll bring in supplies and keep them in my desk for myself and one other co-worker to use. Everyone else can eat with their fingers and drink strong-ass coffee if they don't want to contribute.
I brought work home again this weekend. Mostly because I can't seem to get everything I need to get accomplished actually accomplished while I'm at work. Some of it is my fault (namely - I'm a notorious procrastinator), but a lot of it I attribute to my co-workers and their ability to take up so much of my day with stupid questions, petty "emergencies" and miscellanious bu!!sh*t.

Nothing says I love you like minty freshness on your sleeve

My son decided to rub his toothpastey face on my shoulder while I was hugging him goodbye this morning. I just noticed the little white smudge. And I'm leaving it there.

I spent the better part of the weekend worrying about upcoming deadlines for projects this week. And then when I got to work today I realized that the deadline I was most worried about is about three weeks away.

M is one of the few people who regularly reads my blog. Okay. Maybe she's the only person who regularly reads my rantings and random musings. And when she's not reading and leaving comments it feels so...empty. [stage whisper] Book two is good by the way. [/stage whisper]

Because the worlds problems are our problems - DUH!

This week's media scare brought to you by...Global Warming! What...again? Okkkayyy...

So a bunch of old crusty military guys got together to voice concern that pending climatic changes will cause threats to our country's national security. According to their undoubtably scientific investigation of the facts, global warming will most certainly result in food and water shortages, leading to strife and unrest in already fractured or developing nations. I don't take issue with those statements, at least at face value. What I do take issue with is the idea at the heart of former military generals endorsing the United States being the overseer/protector of the world. Without war, strife, and international conflict, these guys are out of a job.

This quote was too good not to highlight: Gen. Anthony "Tony" Zinni, President Bush's former Middle East envoy, says in the report: "It's not hard to make the connection between climate change and instability, or climate change and terrorism."

Flag on the play - five yards for blatantly invoking the "t" word...Way to fear monger, guys!

At one point in the article, an actual scientist states that the report is rather alarmist (ya think?), because of the possibility that it may take much longer to see the results of climate change. And really - isn't there war, famine and drought already, even in times of so called "plenty" the world over? Honestly, we can cut emissions, limit water usage, and make everything "green" all we want, but we can't force Mexico to stop burning tires.

Way to keep the trend going.

Three reasons why Shia LeBoeuf is single handedly ruining my childhood memories:

• Disturbia. Taking a Hitchcock classic that is an almost perfect example of true suspense and masterful movie making and "reimagining" it as what lamely passes for a modern "thriller". Strike one.


• The Transformers debacle...from the looks of the previews, the CGI is cool. I guess the producers and director are banking on that and the hipster allure of resurrected '80's fads. Huh? The plot? What about...ohhh, you mean...it's supposed to have one. Right. Strike two.


• And strike three: Shia has been confirmed for Indiana Jones 4 (What, no Sir Sean Connery? Was he too busy? Doing...what?). Let me just clarify - I have no problem with the idea of this movie. I'm afraid that Harrison Ford may need a new hip once he's done filming, but I think this would be kind of fun. I can never have enough Indiana Jones. I can certainly have enough god-damned Shia LeBoeuf, though. It's as if there are no other young male actors in Hollywood. Is he attractive and wildly talented and I'm just not seeing it? I seriously hope that the plan is not for Shia-effing-LeBeouf to carry on the Indy series. Please tell me it's not.
  

Plus, he's hosting SNL this weekend. I wonder if his "people" are aware of how this over saturation can backfire.

In other (totally unecessary but I'll still look forward to seeing it) sequel news, it's being reported that Brendan Fraser has signed on for the third installment of The Mummy. Without Rachel Weisz. Bummer. But Jet Li plays the bad guy! Awesome! As long as they don't make him into a computer generated arachnoid...

How green the grass

The manicured lawns around my office building are just an unbelievable shade of green today. All the rain we've been getting is doing wonders for the landscape. It's not doing wonders for my mood, really, but I'm a little anxious for summer to get here already. Of course, once it does and the temperature outside is in the high 90's with almost 100% humidity, I'll be singing another tune. But for now I'm dreaming of white sandy beaches and the sweet nectar of mixed cocktails. The mantra this week: "A lime is a terrible thing to waste."

I care so little, I almost passed out.

Which Scrubs Character Are You?

You're Doctor Cox!
Sarcastic and cynical, but deep down we know you care.
Sometimes it's ok to let that show.
Take this quiz!



The first quiz I took came up with J.D. (take that one yourself!). Maybe I'm J.D. on the outside and Dr. Cox on the inside?

Easter. Bunny.

Happy post-pagan-holiday! How's your blood sugar today? I'm still tweaking a bit, since we combined my son's birthday and the Spring fertility celibration all in one glorious occasion filled with colored cooked eggs (ha - I originally typed "eyes" there!), chocolate and cake. He got lots of good stuff and his grandpa brought him a dozen balloons. Not nearly as many folks came over as we had planned, so there was a lot of food. My brother-in-law lived up to his reputation for being a slack-ass and begged off sick. Except he's not bright enough to give the same story to everyone. Everyone compared notes, and that sparked a fun little bitch fest between his sister and step-dad, which resulted in my husband and I simultaniously quoting Monty Python ("Let's not bicker and argue over who killed who"). And my husband's grandmother acts like her younger son's conversion a couple of years ago was the most heartbreaking thing he could have ever done, so she spent a good part of the day lamenting that. There were also comments about "Jew food" resulting in excess gas and how surprised they were that we now had African American neighbors across the street...as if that's somehow unusual. I stopped listening after a certain point. I think I'll hand out Bat Mitzvah invitations this Christmas and see how that goes over.

We took my son to the beach for his actual birthday last Friday. We got a late start because we drove all over town looking for a place to have breakfast that wasn't packed (who knew so many people took off Good Friday?). We finally ended up at the most poorly run Denny's known to humanity. When we got to the beach it was the afternoon and it was still sooo cold. And windy. But, my son had fun getting covered in sand and dragging Mommy in and out of the water. I don't think he liked the waves much, though - he wouldn't wade out past his belly button. We went to his favorite restaurant for an early dinner later in the afternoon and called it a night.

I'm thinking of writing a poem called An Ode to Post Long Weekend Mondays. It would consist entirely of me flicking off people who ask me for anything. I guess it would be more like performance art...

Hotter than a Sunday barn raising

I made a troubling discovery last night at Sam's Club. Apparently one of their better selling items is a whole series of novels written around Amish characters. The plot synopsis of the one I picked up had something to do with plain people in love and dark family secrets...or something. Who would buy these? Certainly not actual Amish. The books were nesteled in with the spiritually uplifting editions, such as a book by Sylvia Browne (the famous fake psychic whose other talents apparently include telling you how to live a better life), The Secret (what a crock of crap), Chicken Soup for the Blogger's Soul (okay -- I made that one up), so I can only imagine the moral lessons imparted on the pages of these books. Of course, then I made the mistake of running an Amazon search and discovered that there is actually a market for these. And that there is a market for Amish romance novels?! Check out the cover of "Thee I Love, An Amish Historical". Has the artist never actually been to Amish country? I never saw a Stoltzfus that looked like that guy. And I'm assuming that the woman is not supposed to be Amish. Honestly, I'm really not sure what to think of her dress. The reader comments are just...bizarre. Five stars all around? Are you serious?

But I did just find out that a new JRR Tolkien book will be released April 17th. How is this happening and I didn't know about it until now? I've really got to get out from under my rock a little more often...

Math is hard. Lets go shopping!

I started the first step for registering for an Accounting class in the summer. You're jealous, I know - you're all "Accounting! How glamorous. You lucky bitch...". Just the application process alone took way too long. I started it this morning, and had to stop and finish it this evening because I was lacking some info that was needed earlier in the day. I still have to register and enroll for the class! One freaking class. I had to verify my citizenship in the state I've been living in for the better part of my life. Four times. Driver's registration. Voter registration. Vehicle registration. Some blood. A part of my soul. First born child. A spindle of hand spun gold thread. Oh...sorry. I got the university mixed up with Rumplestiltskin again. My bad.

I have a new comic to add to my list of favorite web comics.
It's totally irreverant and strange. I love it!

Gratuitous speed. Now with more cleavage!

Alright. My vote for most blatantly formulaic and totally unecessary movie of the year so far goes to...RedLine. Aka: The Fast and the Furious 4: More Furiouser. Or RedLine: Still 2 Fast, Still 2 Furious - tagline "This time, it's combustable". It's basically crashing cars and bewbs - and it's everywhere (just have a peek at the movie's Myspace page to see where the emphasis is and the marketing is blatantly targeted - the top five search results all pointed back to MySpace but you can see the trailers on the official movie site. Not that I'm advocating that. In fact, I'm a little ashamed I'm even spending this much time talking about this movie...). At first glance I thought the chick in the trailer (Nadia Bjorlin - I know, you're thinking "Who?", right? Exactly...) was funny car driver John Force's daughter, Ashley. I'm pretty sure Ashley Force (or any member of her family...or hell, any member of my family) could out-drive the tarted up skank in RedLine. Now there's a movie plot - what happens when a professional driver challenges a slutty "actress" to a dangerous high-speed road race in rare expensive cars? Cinema gold! Throw in tons of t&a, heavily coordinated crash sequences to break up what poses as a "plot", the ubiquitous rapper, the way too pretty bad boy with a heart of gold and run laughing all the way to the bank. Wait. That sounds familiar...

"We are sorry in the most sarcastic sense of the word"

The video below hurt my ears. Alanis revamping Fergie is an assault on the auditory senses, not to mention the fact that the song itself is an affront to decency standards anywhere - it represents everything that is wrong with mainstream music. But this did make me laugh for a good solid couple of minutes. [M - the headbutting/hairfluffing part for some reason made me think of you...I wonder why?]



There was an internet rumor going around that Cartoon Network was going to air the new Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie tonight (you can see the totally metal movie poster at the movie's IMDB page). There was a a certain sense of "yeah, right" and general pooh-poohing in certain circles. But - turns out it was true. Only one problem. It's being broadcast in a tiny little unviewable box in the left hand of the screen, kind of like extreme mini-picture in picture.

(There's a Mooninite soundboard, people!)

I am making a list of movies I want to see this summer, starting with Hot Fuzz (from the brilliant people who brought us Shaun of the Dead), and Stardust - I think I need to read the book first, but it looks genius! If you like farce, humor and science fiction, I really recommend anything written by Neil Gaiman. And Terry Pratchett, too!

She's so well preserved...like a mummy in the Sahara

A lady who just came in looking for someone who doesn't even work here had skin like a fine crocodile handbag, all tanned to a leathery and creased consistency. I don't know how old she was, but simply judging by the look of her epidermis she was childhood friends with Moses on the Nile delta. That, dear children, is the reason we use sunscreen! That and not wanting skin cancer.
This weather is too nice to be sitting here wasting my life. I hear the sweet siren call of the sand and surf. It's a good thing I already had planned on going to the beach on Friday - otherwise I might be tempted to do something rash, like, say...call off while none of the bosses are here.
I was thinking about taking a class this summer, but I'll probably wait until the fall. Maybe. I'm just no motivated to do it if I'm only doing it as non-degree seeking. Yes - I know that working towards the degree would help me make more money. I'm just not sure if spending the time and money is what's right for me in my life right now. If ever. I'm terribly conflicted about the whole thing, and the recent classification change at my job basically made it so that the only way to advance is for me to have a Bachelor's degree. Which would take me eight to ten years to get if I worked on it a little at a time. So that's just great. Does hard work mean nothing to these people?

Mental sidebar: "God, woman. Don't stand in the doorway to my office having a rather loud verbal tennis match with IT. You're ruining my reverie. Get outtttt!!"

Why is my HTML embed code not working today? I blame the Mongols...

	Your super-secret codename is: AS UM
	Your mission is... Travel back in time to take out Ghengis Khan - for obvious reasons
'What is your codename and mission?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Watch out Chaka Khan - you're next!